Thursday, July 25, 2013

Mary Louise Bingham Personal History

Mary Louise Van Dell (Van der Ploeg) Bingham

Born 2 June 1935 in Bell, California to John Van Dell and Annie Louise Alderman.  I have one older brother and one younger sister.   My parents liked the name Mary and Louise is after my mother and maternal grandmother.
          When I was about 4 years old my aunt married to my Dad’s oldest brother came up with a new surname and the family must have liked it enough to change from van der Ploeg to Van Dell.  The reason for the change is the name was hard to pronounce I was told.  My nicknames were Memmel by my father and his clan and also bug.  Once in a while it was jitterbug.  I was a child that could not sit still for more than a few minutes.
Father came to California from New Jersey as a child because his father thought the family would be healthier and have a better life.  My grandfather was a widow with 7 young children.  His parents, a brother, Pete, and a cousin my Dad’s age, Bill, came with him by train.  My mother born in Georgia came to California from Alabama as a young married woman with her first husband who was in the US Navy.  I understand she married this man hoping for a better life.  They came with her older sister, Elizabeth, and her husband who was also in the military.  My mother did not have a good life losing both parents at an early age and living in poverty.
I don’t remember the first couple of houses we lived in around Bell, California.  The first one I really recollect was a housing complex in East Los Angeles.  There were approximately 8 two story apartments in each complex and we lived in one second to the end.  We had a kitchen, living room, two bedrooms and one bathroom for the five of us.  We had modern plumbing and electricity and later a dial telephone. We moved to Richmond, California when I was 10 years old and got our first TV.  I lived there until my last two years of high school when we moved to El Cerrito, California but still in the Richmond School District.  This home was quite a nice home.
After high school graduation (1953) my family moved to Pasadena, California where I lived for  three years.  I graduated from Pasadena City College (1955).  I had worked part-time in a insurance office and after graduation worked full time for an insurance agent, Charles L. Arthur.  In the spring of 1956, I took a trip to Hawaii with a PCC friend, Barbara Keyston.  We took the cruise ship, the Luraleen, over and flew back home.
Shortly upon my return I met my eternal companion, Gerald Bingham, at an engagement party.  I worked with the bride’s Mom and Jerry worked with the groom.  The following March 9, 1957, we were married in the Chapel of the Roses in Pasadena.  I was not raised with religion and Jerry was not involved in this church at that time.  A minister of my uncle David Van Dell married us.
We first lived in Huntington Park and about a year later purchased a home in Bellflower, California.  I quit my job as a secretary for the assistant purchasing agent at Thermador Products when our first child was born, Janet Louise, 18 May 1959.  Eleven months after our second child Michael John, 10 April 1962, was born we moved to Pleasant Hill, California.  In the summer of 1969 we moved to Fresno, California where we were in partnership with my Dad, a jewelry and giftware store.  I worked part time helping to get it set up and going.  In July 1972 we opened up our own jewelry and giftware store in Stockton, California (lived in Lodi, CA) but closed it down due to competition in 1985.  We then purchased an existing durable medical supply company (Lodi Sickroom Supply) where I worked for the first few years.  In June of 2001, we moved to Alpine, Utah due to inspiration we received to do so.
I do not have many early childhood memories and I believe it is partly because there were things that were not positive and I did not want to remember except those are some of the things I do remember most.
My father was domineering, outgoing, intelligent, impatient, ambitious, and a hard worker.  I guess he would be called a workaholic as his job was his life and his social world.  He often gave someone a nickname.  He loved is family including his siblings and was generous to them.  In fact, he was generous to any who was honest, fair and loyal to him.  Once he took a job that was not very promising because of his loyalty to his boss.  He did not graduate from high school but was very successful in the business world with Snap-on Tools Corp.  He was very devoted to my Mother when she became seriously ill and tended to her every need which is something he did little of before.
My mother was insecure, lacked self-esteem, and had problems with depression.  She loved her family and was a very devoted mother and wife.  She loved babies and liked animals, music and had a good singing voice.  She was small, only 5 ft. tall but quite brave when it came to things such a trying to kill a snake and rescuing a woman that was attacked behind our house.  (My Dad was in the house for the last one.)  My brother John Edwin (2 plus years older) was outgoing, intelligent, confident and a nice person.  He was patient particularly with his wife.  My sister Helen (5 yrs younger) is more reserved, not as outgoing and more like my mother in many ways.  She is very generous, loves her children and saw to their needs as a single parent.  She also loves animals.
I waited for the day I could play poker with my parents and aunts and uncles on Saturday night in Pasadena.  I watched them play from the time I was very young.  Our whole family really didn’t play any games together but poker and a little bingo.  As an older child, our family went high school football, to the midget auto races and some pro football games like the SF 49ers. During this time, we also would dine out.  In younger years, I played some with my siblings like Monopoly, and with playing cards.  I liked to color, play with paper dolls and as I got older was a fan of a number of movie stars.  I liked to go to movies, play with neighbor friends.  I remember putting on plays and musicals and playing softball and kick the can.  I also like to play store and be the cast register.  They always said I was a fast runner as a child.  I was a Brownie Girl Scout and took piano lessons until I thought I was too busy as a teenager to practice.  
The chores I did mostly were the dishes, cleaning my bedroom, cleaning up after our dog and some cleaning house.  I know my brother and I both wanted to wash the dishes and would fight over it.  I did not like to iron but my least favorite was cleaning up after our dog, Smudgy.  I always shared a room with my siblings and later just with my sister until I was 18 years old. While living in Richmond (I was age 10 to 16) our bedroom was at the back of the house.  We lived in a neighborhood where some tragic things scary things happened so either my sister or I wanted to be the first to go back there after dark.  My Dad was more cautious than my Mom when it came to hearing noise outside at night.  I remember many times turning all the lights out so we could peek out better.
I was a good, obedient student who never wanted to get into trouble.  My best subjects were math, spelling, art and physical education.  I did not like science as not all subjects were easy for me.  I always felt my brother and sister had more of my Dad’s intelligence but I was more like my Mom, with much less.  I had a speech impediment that gave my voice a nasal sound and I was very conscious of it and this made be very shy.  In grammar school I had to go to special speech classes which I did not like that did nothing for me. It wasn’t until I was in junior high that it was discovered why I talk nasal.  I have no uvula and my palate is paralyzed.  Therefore, I hated current events and would take a ‘F’ rather than get up in front of the class.  I attended grammar school at Dakota St. in East Los Angeles, and for two years in Richmond, Ca.  At the time we moved to northern California, my teacher considered my skipping a grade which later could never understand why.  My middle grades 7 through 9 were at Longfellow Jr. High School and Richmond High School, again in Richmond.  I graduated from Pasadena City College with an associates’ degree in business.  I did not participate enough in any extra circular school activities to mention.  I was in the senior play as a dancer.
I almost always wore bangs that were short in earlier days and in style.  I never had very long hair.  In high school we wore at triangle scarf on our head with the tie at our chin.  Also, small scarves tied at our neck.  We curled our hair with bobby pins.  I always did my mother’s as she thought she could not do it herself.  I worn white suede shoes or brown/white saddle oxfords (Spaulding brand) with socks rolled down to our ankles.  Skirts length was below knee and little on long side.  We never wore pants or shorts to school.  
I don’t recall any high school heroes but did collect pictures of movie stars.  In fact, I wrote to a number to receive an autograph picture.  I never sang because of my bad voice although my mom had a rather good voice.  I liked many of the popular ballads and rock and roll music.  I always loved music and often listened to it.
Our first family dog was a red chow named Tootsie.   We then had a mongrel dog named Smudgy who looked like a shaggy sheep dog.  We found her in a vacant field near our house.  We tried to have a kitten a time or two but they did not last long.  My dad did not like cats.
I remember two childhood friends named Wendy and Courtney when living in the apartment complex.  Typical of three friends, we did not always get along well.  Darlene Durflinger who I met in junior high became a very close friend to this day.  I have kept in touch with several other high school and college friends.
I had no religion growing up and never attended church with my family.  My parents knew an old widow, Laura, who took my brother and me to church a few times when small.  I went a couple of times with a friend as an older child.  The religion was Methodist.  Because I married an LDS man, I was contacted at  different times by missionaries.  Finally in 1967 I was ready to receive them and baptism followed in Walnut Creek on 1 April 1967, the same year our daughter was baptized.  It took me several years (and Jerry too) to be converted to full activity.  We were sealed in the Oakland Temple in 29 July 1972 with our three children.  I have never been without a temple recommend since then.  My membership in the church along, with my family, are my most prized possessions.  Over the years I have served some in Relief Society, more in Primary but mostly in the Young Women Program, about 20 plus years.  In all three organizations it was almost always been in presidencies.  In February 1998 we left for the Philippines Manila Mission to serve as senior missionaries.  It was one of greatest and most rewarding experiences we have had.  We would have served another mission if it weren’t for me being diagnosed with cancer in 2002.  For the past 8 years I have been heavily involved in family history work and receive great satisfaction from it.  I have seen that temple work has been done for thousand of my ancestors, mostly my Dutch line.  I have over 25,000 names in my personal ancestral file.



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